Battle Royale

Director: Kinji Fukasaku

Year: 2000

Language: Japanese (English Subtitles)

Length: 1 hour 57 minutes (117 minutes)

Staring: Tatsuya Fujiwara, Aki Maeda, Taro Yamamoto, Takeshi Kitano, Sousuke Takaoka, Takeshi Tsukamoto, Yukihiro Kotani, Eri Ishikawa, Sayaka Kamiya, Aki Inoue, Takyo Mimura, Yutaka Shimada, Ren Matsuzawa, Hirohito Honda, Ryou Nitta

Plot: Set in Japan at the start of a new millennium when unemployment is at a serious high and violence amongst the nation's youth is spiralling out of control. With school children boycotting their lessons and physically attacking their teachers (at the start of the film one boy sticks a knife in a teachers leg), a near-defeated and beleaguered government. decides to introduce a new and completely radical measure: The Battle Royale Act.

Overseen by a former teacher, a randomly chosen school class is alluded into thinking they're going on a school trip and is actually taken to a deserted island then forced to fight each other to the death. The act dictates that only one pupil will be allowed to survive the punishment. He or she will return, not as the victor, but as the ultimate threat and proof of the lengths to which the government are prepare to go to put a stop of the youths disobedience. The winner then goes on to join another class in their battle (as shown by the two students that join in the beginning)

It has to be one of the most controversial film ever, it manages to be clever, creepy and ultra violent at all the same time. Battle Royale is a jewel in the crown of Japanese cinema. 

Review: Okay, first off, Tatsuya Fukiwara is so freaking beautiful. This film is so fucking fantastic! The island its shot on is beautiful and the camera man really knows what he's doing, they know exactly when sweeping wide shots or close shots are relevant. I think the serenity of the island really adds to the creepiness of the whole thing though, the director really knew what he was doing with this film.  

The film itself is super amazing! Its gore at its best and is super creepy. It really shows 'the human condition' at its best, and shows the lengths to which people will truly go just to save themselves. Even when they try to ban together, it fails and they turn on each other. 

I find the ending a little obvious and a bit like the film just kind of... fizzles out.

Quotes: "I saw a tampon in the toilet and [name] wasn't on her period... but didn't you come on just a few days ago?" I don't why but it just made me laugh. 

Overall Rating: 4.9/5 (would be a 5 if the ending was better...XD)

History Of The World: Part I

Director: Mel Brooks

Year: 1981

Language: English

Length: 1 hour and 28 minutes (88 minutes)

Staring: Mel Brooks, Pamela Stephenson, Dom DeLuise, Madiline Kahn, Harvey Korman, Cloris Leachman, Gregory Hines, Spike Milligan, Ron Carey, Sid Caesar. (I feel like I'm missing someone important... any idea who?)

Plot: This film is a spoof of some of the greatest moments in history, from the beginning of humanity through Roman times and the French Revolution to round off oddly somewhere in the middle. This film is yet another show of Mel Brooks fantastic abilities as he gives a twisted history lesson with his usual vulgar satire and mad humour. The film is narrated by the fantastic voice of Orson Welles, and tells of the progress of mankind as cave dweller, tap-dancing black slave and biblical hero Moses. As well as mocking famous historical events it also mocks historical films, most notably 'The Greatest Story Ever Told' and 'The Ten Commandments, as well as a brilliant parody of '2001: A space Odyssey'.

Review: First of all let me just say there is no part II, there is a clip at the end of what would be in it and it's hilarious, but alas no part II in sight my friends. But, that aside, go see this film. Now. Go. I'll wait. Seen it? Love it? I know. How could you not?! As soon as you see the first 10 minutes of the film, you're in love. My favourite bit had to be where Moses come down from mount Sinai and has three tables "I'll show the people your fifteen rules." Then he dops one. "Everyone I have the ten commandments of God!" Or something like that, either way hilair. XD Though I do warn, if you have no sense of humour... you won't like this film. Every single line is a joke and to be taken as such, nothing in it is serious, there are racial, sexist, gay and sex jokes throughout it and can offend some. 

Quotes: The whole film is one big quote... It's hard to choose particulars. They're so many dick/sex/gay jokes.

Overall Rating: 5/5 GO WATCH IT NOW. SHOO, SHOO!

Blazing Saddles

Director: Mel Brooks

Year: 1974

Language: English

Length: 1hour 29minutes (89 Minutes)

Staring: Cleavon Little, Gene Wo;der, Slim Pickens, Madeline Kahn, Mel Brooks, Alex Karras, David Huddleston, Claude Ennis Starrett Jr., Dom DeLuise

Plot: (Taken from LoveFilm.com because I'm lazy.) A hilarious, madcap spoof of nearly every Hollywood Western convention, BLAZING SADDLES turns racism on its head at every turn. When the sheriff of a small frontier town is killed, convict Bart (Cleavon Little) is appointed the first black sheriff of the all-white Rock Ridge by the evil Hedley Lamarr (Harvey Korman) in a bid to chase the townspeople from their homes. The naive Sheriff Bart soon realizes from the less-than-cheery welcome that the townspeople (who all seem to be named Johnson) aren't prepared for a black sheriff and that he was never meant to succeed at all. Enlisting the sensitive town drunk (Gene Wilder), formerly the Waco Kid, Bart embarks on a plan to help save Rock Ridge. A scathing spoof that deals with racism, sexism, and bodily functions, BLAZING SADDLES offers a contrast between picture and words that is shocking, subversive, and hysterical. 

Director Mel Brooks, working from an hilarious script-- written, by among others, Richard Pryor—makes two memorable appearances as both the sleazy governor and a Yiddish-speaking Sioux Indian chief, while Madeline Kahn does a side-splitting Marlene Dietrich imitation as the town floozy/entertainer. Featuring fabulous comic turns by Alex Karras, Slim Pickens, and the aforementioned Little, Brooks, Korman, and Wilder, BLAZING SADDLES is one of the raunchiest, funniest, and most beloved spoofs ever made.

Review: It is yet another marvellous achievement by one of the greatest directors of all time, especially since working with comedic script writing genius that is Richard Pryor. This film starts of perhaps a little slow but then it flies away with hilarity. It is pure genius taking the piss out of film, after film, after film, from The Sundance Kid to Rio Bravo to The great Big Band sound of Count Bassie. Each and every character has their own twist to their personality that shapes their lines and deliverance. I still have no idea how Gene Wilder and Cleavon Little deliver some of their lines with such serious faces. I'm not certain that Mel Brooks does.

The best bit of the film is definitely at the ending that I hate to kill, where they storm the studio and then with The Great Pie fight with a saluting Hitler in the back ground before continuing to run amok! Then they quickly put the cherry on the top of the cake with a quick Sheriff cliche parting. 

Quotes: "Gawd... you use yer tongue perdier than a $20 whore." 
"Hey, where the white women at?" 
"And now for my next impression... Jessie Owens. *Runs*" 
"Head them off at the pass... I hate that cliche! *shoots*" 
"Oh lord do we have the strength to carry out this might task... or are we just jerking off?" 
"Somebodies gotta go back and get a shit loada dimes." 
BEST LINE: "Piss on you! I'm working for Mel Brooks!"

Overall Rating: 5/5

Your Highness

Director: David Gorden Green 

Year: 2001

Language: English

Length: 1 hour 42 minutes (102 mins)

Staring: James Franco, Danny McBride, Zoey Deshanel, Charles Dance, Noah Huntley, Justin Theroux, Natalie Portman

Plot: Thadeous (McBride) plays a useless, whiny younger brother with jealousy issues of a great hero, Fabeous (Franco) - who has a serious brother complex. Just before Fabeous gets married, his beautiful bride-to-be, Belladonna (Deshanel), is kidnapped by an evil wizard (Theroux). Thadeous and Fabeous then set out on a wild journey to save her. Fabeous gets caught and Thadeous has to continue the grave journey to find the Unicorn bone sword and save his brother on his own along with, wild vixen, Isabel (Portman).

Review: Firstly, I would like to say, back off other reviewers! Why you hating? This film is both weird and hilarious. I don't think there was a moment when I wasn't laughing. Seriously. If you have seen any of McBride's other films and liked them, you'll like this. It has a ton of faces you'll recognise and a ton of jokes you'll love. Trust me, this is a film you'll want to see. Its all extremely good acting and fantastic shots of beautiful scenery along side all the goofy, strange, funny weirdness. I used this film to make me feel better with a tub of B&J and it really worked.

P.S the dwarf king looked like Roland from Sabrina The Teenage Witch... Anyone know if it was?

Quotes: 'Thadeous: Brother! Handle thy shit.'
'Fabeous: It's the sake of the mission!'
and any time Fabeous tells Thadeous he loves him XD

Overall Rating: 4/5